Repost From Facebook: On Donald Trump

I have here multiple political posts from my Facebook. I hope it’s all I ever have to say between now and the election:

As I’ve mentioned, Trump is not your only option. Please, if you can’t vote Clinton, consider voting Johnson to tell the Republican party open racism and sexism shouldn’t be the primary Republican platform. In addition, Johnson has, to my knowledge, never bankrupted a company through mismanagement where Trump has done that four times. Johnson has experience as a governor where Trump has never held any political office. If you want to vote an actual, competent conservative then voting for Trump, an idiot trash fire of a human being, is the last thing you should do even if you aren’t moved by empathy for literally anyone who isn’t a straight, white, Christian man (because make no mistake Trump will make their lives objectively worse). Do the right thing and stop Donald Trump. No matter who you are or what your politics are it is the best thing you could do for not only yourself but for everyone else.

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Okay, I sincerely hope that’s the last time I feel the need to talk politics for a while. I think I’ve honestly covered everything, if you’re still going to vote Trump even knowing there’s a better conservative out there then I straight don’t know what to do for you.

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Ah crap one more thing. Two more, actually. In case you think I’m being unfair, the second one is for liberals so sit tight.

First, to conservative friends and family who haven’t been swayed from Trump to Johnson, I hate to break it to you but you’ve been had. Lied to. Er, more than is normal for a politician. Those things Trump is telling you that you shpuld be scared of to terrify you into voting for him? Lies. I know you are smart, decent people. If you weren’t I wouldn’t talk to you. So pour a stiff drink or some nice tea, get on Google (because I know you have Google if you can read this) and look up facts. Hard facts. I’ll even give you some quick ones now: there are billions of Muslims. If Islam, as a religion, wanted America to fall it would have done already. Black people are not plotting to kill you. And, speaking as a white janitor in Texas, your jobs aren’t under direct threat from Mexican immigrants. That’s just for starters. So keep going down that rabbit hole and free yourself from irrational fear. I’m confident enough in you as a person that, once you know the facts, you won’t let Trump keep hoodwinking you.

And now for liberals. Specifically holdover Sanders supporters who plan on either writing in his name or spitevoting or simply not voting because Clinton isn’t exactly 100% what they want. Welcome to politics, apparently this is your first rodeo. Here’s lesson one: politicians lie and cheat all the time. It’s part of their job. Deal with it, because if Trump wins I’m holding you responsible. That’s right. Every time one of my Hispanic friends down here is harassed, every time my gay friends are threatened I will give you an equal share of the blame. So fold up your tinfoil hats, get your heads out of your asses and your dicks out of your hands and fucking deal with the fact that for all your blind, straight white whining about Clinton being a perfectly average politician everyone who doesn’t look like us will get way worse than the business as usual you have the gall to say you’re “scared” of if your masturbatory self-righteousness let’s Tump win.

Fucking hell, I hate politics. Someone get me a cat picture and my moonshine.

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Crap, two more things then I swear I’m done.

One, if you want Trump because he’s a TV celebrity with no political experience try looking into Ron White. Seriously, unless his appeal for you is “he’s a racist, sexist, incompetent liar” then I guarantee you there’s someone you’d like more on the ticket.

Second, I’m not asking anyone to trust Clinton or Johnson. I’m not even asking anyone to trust the facts (you’ll never hear me say that again). All I ask is, please, trust me.

Aerys Targaryen for President: My Thoughts on the Election

So against Donald Trump, I’d dig up my building’s septic tank and vote for my own turds before that monster. I don’t like Goldman-Sa, er, sorry, Time Warn- damn, I mean Clinton (Sorry, I tend to blur things together when they only difference is semantic) but not as badly as I hate Trump. Oh sure, she can give a completely hollow speech about income inequality wearing a jacket more valuable than the total money I will ever own in my life or send Bill to polling places or claim to she’ll be tough on the banks that paid for her campaign, but that hypocrisy and rulebreaking is nothing compared to “Muslims should be tracked in a database and monitored” or “Mexicans are rapists.”

This election cycle has basically proven every negative stereotype of both parties true – big-corporation limousine liberals who are out of touch with the common people using their money and influence to flood the social consciousness with their image or shift debates to times that help them (Clinton and CNN are both at least partly owned by Time Warner, for example, so CNN had a good reason not to cover Sanders unless they absolutely had to therefore keeping him out of the running for people who still use obsolete means of getting news like TV) and racist, sexist Republican fascists. Seriously, look up what either side says about the other. Both candidates are basically a caricature of what the other side believes.

I hate both candidates. A lot. Along with all currently active politicians at this point. I hated Sanders the least but never thought he could win. No outcome of this election is good for poor people. I will always have student debt, I exist to be a profit center for people who piss away my entire life’s worth in an hour of boat-cocaine-hooker parties. Clinton may represent that more than Trump thanks to her banking, hedge fund and big corporate connections, which is why a good deal of Sanders supporters were vocally against Clinton even more than being against Trump. I acknowledge that because facts aren’t there to make me happy.

Another thing that doesn’t make me happy is a schoolyard bully like Trump will plow right over Clinton, because while facts aren’t there to make me happy in Trumpland they may as well not exist. “Oh those e-mails! Benghazi! $12k Armani jacket at a speech about income inequality by someone whose campaign is funded by those same billionaires that stand to gain by preserving income inequality! Superdelegates! Big business ties! Political dynasties! The banks that murdered your future then got bailed out on your money support her!” Against someone less awful than Trump there’s a laundry list of reasons, legitimate and otherwise, to not vote Clinton. A laundry list Trump and the GOP can and will use to get swing voters and angry progressives who are sick of limousine liberals to vote Trump just to not be voting for Clinton. Also, unlike in the primaries where Sanders had no chance and the media had no reason to allow him any real screentime in order to make sure Clinton got the most attention the media isn’t going to be 100% on her side. She’ll have an actual fight instead of a walk this time and, like against Obama, I don’t think she’s got it in her to win. Basically, I assume Donald Trump is already the victor.

I’ll vote either for Clinton or for Ron White (because an alcoholic, pothead, womanizing comedian is atually a legitimately better choice than both main party monsters) when the time comes. My state is single-color enough my individual vote doesn’t matter so I might be able to save my conscience by doing that. Or maybe I’ll write in “my literal feces.” Because that’s also better than them or any other active politician.

But like I’ve been saying on Twitter because it’s better to laugh than cry: “Aerys Targaryen for President, #BurnThemAll2016.” As a poor guy I’m fucked either way, so the only reason I care is because not all my friends are straight white Christian cis males and I’d like for their lives to NOT suck, please, which means a hard no on Donald Trump.